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Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Nine Repetitive Onomatopoeic Japanese Words

1. Chiku-taku (tick tock)
2. Gari-Gari (scratching)
3. Pan-pan (prostitute)
4. Potsu-potsu (drip drop)
5. Sara-sara (flowing water)
6. Ton-ton (tapping)
7. Wa-wa (baby crying)
8. Zanpan (leftovers)
9. Za-za (pelting rain)

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Ten Blue Plaques I'd Like To See

1. Brian Harvey ran himself over here.
2. John Prescott threw a punch here.
3. George Michael drove into a car parked opposite here.
4. Diana Ross was frisked here.
5. Kate Moss had a quiet night in here.
6. Naomi Campbell's mobile phone landed here.
7. Tony Blair felt the hand of history on his shoulder here.
8. Blake was incarcerated here.
9. Elton landed Michael Caine his album deal here.
10. Tom Cruise was last popular here.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Ten Lessons To Be Learnt From Dennis Potter

1. Resist cynicism, invite criticism.
2. Appreciate the now.
3. Don't be seduced by conformity.
4. Nurture and cherish talent.
5. Figures aren't everything.
6. There are reasons for tradition.
7. Fight the commodification of public life.
8. Be true to your idea.
9. Put wood to good use.
10. Always make time for your dad

Ten Catchphrases For Imaginary 80s US Sitcoms

1. Wake me up and tell me I'm dreaming!
2. The whole damn world's gone doolally!
3. No, it's just my Rubick's Snake!
4. Well kick me up the ass!
5. That's what Dr Harbunkle said!
6. By the power of stray gulls!
7. I just moved into the brownstone!
8. I thought you said we didn't need cords!
9. Has anyone seen my hairspray?
10. It even tells the time!

Saturday, November 03, 2007

Ten Prince Albums Nobody Really Bothered With

1. O(+> (1992)
2. Come (1994)
3. The Gold Experience (1995)
4. Chaos and Disorder (1996)
5. Emancipation (1996)
6. Rave Un2 The Joy Fantastic (1999)
7. The Rainbow Children (2001)
8. Xpectation (2003)
9. N.E.W.S. (2003)
10. Musicology (2004)

Ten Great Seventh Tracks On Albums

1. Johnny Cash, American IV – 'Personal Jesus'
2. Mary J Blige, My Life – 'My Life'
3. Klaxons, Myths of the Near Future – 'Gravity’s Rainbow'
4. Bob Dylan, Pat Garrett & Billy The Kid – 'Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door'
5. Rufus Wainwright, Rufus Wainwright – 'Beauty Mark'
6. The Stone Roses, Second Coming – 'Begging You'
7. Prince Po, The Slickness – 'The Slickness'
8. Portishead, Dummy – 'Numb'
9. The Fall, Fall Heads Roll – 'Blindness'
10. Pixies, Doolittle - 'Monkey Gone to Heaven'

Ten Perfect Instrumental Tracks

1. Giorgio Moroder - 'The Chase'
2. Aphex Twin - 'Goon Gumpas'
3. New Order - 'Elegia' (full version)
4. David Crosby - 'Tamalpais High'
5. Booka Shade - 'Vertigo'
6. David Bowie - 'A New Career In A New Town'
7. Michael Head and The Strands - 'Undecided (Reprise)'
8. Paul McCartney - 'Singalong Junk'
9. Durutti Column - 'Sketch For Summer'
10. Blind Willie Johnson - 'Dark Was The Night' (sighing doesn't count)

Ten Perfect Ways To Start The Weekend

1. Cat jumping on head.
2. Finding out what you can use that quince in the fridge for on Saturday Kitchen.
3. 'At Last I Am Free' by Robert Wyatt.
4. Listening to hysterical relationship break-up happening outside bedroom window, and feeling glad it's not us.
5. Realising November = Christmas at Starbucks.
6. Wondering why the odds for 'Agbonlahor' to be first scorer in the Arsenal v Man U game are so low in the window of the local Ladbrokes, considering he plays for Aston Villa.
7. Fry-up at Jenny's.
8. Tabloid football coverage.
9. The view coming home.
10. Live football before you've even woken up properly.